So, we've been trying to potty train Tommy (it's not working) and so his interest in the potty is off the charts. The other night I (Rob) came home from a friend's house with Tommy and had to pee like a race horse. So, I busted into the bathroom and gently swung the door closed behind me, but it didn't latch. Tommy knew exactly what was going on in there, so he threw the door open while I was in full urination mode. The excitement on his face when he saw daddy "going pee-pee like a big boy in the potty" was too much to handle and he lunged forward to get a closer look. Unfortunately for him, I was standing with a wide stance and he tripped over my foot, which catapulted him towards the cammode. Both of his little hands grasped the rim of the toilet, stopping him from falling right in to the toilet. That's not the bad part. His momentum carried his larger-than-average head directly into my urine stream. It all happened so fast that it took a moment for me to realize what had just happened...I just peed on my kid's face. I knew he was in shock because he just stood there, with both hands still grasped tightly to the porcelain, until he finally allowed one hand to wipe the urine from his eye. Kate was in bed by this time and when she heard the tub water running (we'd already given him his nightly bath by this time) she came out to see what was going on; why would I be giving our son another bath??? So, then I had to explain to her that I had just peed all over her son's face. Ohhh, the joys of fatherhood! I can just see him in 10 years, laying on a couch, explaining to a shrink that all of his anxiety and social problems started as a child, when his father peed on his face. Hopefully he's too young to remember it. I hope that's the case, but only time will tell.
4 years ago
