Gift giving for the Wife..Husbands listen up

My cousin came up with this list for what husbands should and should not do for gifts, and I thought it was great. Take a look: I think almost anyone could benefit from a few basic tips/rules/suggestions for more effective holiday shopping.

So here we go:

1) Don't buy her jewelery. Unless you have really good taste.
2) You probably don't have really good taste.
3) things that are out unless specified on her list: electronics, exercise equipment, cleaning supplies, things for her car.
4) Ask her friends. Ask her friends what their favorite books are, and get her one that she doesn't have yet. Same goes for music and movies.
5) Instead of buying her clothes, give her a gift card to her favorite clothing store. It isn't tacky or impersonal. It's a gift with three purposes. !) she gets new clothes. 2) You're giving her the gift of shopping. Most women will tell you that at least half the joy of clothing comes from shopping for it. That's why they call it "retail therapy". 3) Now she already has a way to go blow off some steam the next time you upset her. ;)
6) If you go unique, stick with her style. Don't give a vintage treasure to a contemporary minimalist. Do give the antique butter churner to the farmhouse knick knack collector.
7) Give the gift of time. Time away to relax at a massage, pedicure, or haircut. Time together at a concert, theater, or bed & breakfast (hey, that one probably benefits you too!) Time you spent on fixing/creating something for her.
8) Think ahead. Don't limit yourself to gifts that can only be enjoyed during the winter months. Get her and the kids season passes to the pool, zoo, or amusement park. Plant a bunch of bulbs in the yard when she is out one day, and give her the gift of anticipating a flowery spring.
9) Think: "What will make her life easier or more enjoyable?" when giving gifts of service.
10) Even if you "stick to the list", make sure there is at least one surprise for her. Even if it is a pack of her favorite gum tucked into her stocking, some hair product one of her friends recommends, or a kitchen gadget.
11) Try not to sabotage her goals. For example, if you know she has a resolution to lose 20 lbs in 2012, don't give her a gift card to TCBY, and don't stuff her stocking with a 6 month supply of harry and davids. Instead, if you know she wants to read more, get her a book, run more, load up her ipod with good running music or get her a jogger pepper spray, Gatorade, and some Gu, or a cute bag to put her workout gear in. Notice how careful I was to not include a workout video or gym membership in that list of suggestions. Whether she wants to create, travel, write, save, or learn, try to think of ways to build her up and help her do those things, rather than gifting something that will distract or prevent her from doing what she wants.
12) Nothing beats a handwritten note. And words of appreciation are free.
13) Now, make the holidays easy and go make a list of ideas for her to get for you. There must be at least 10 things on the list that are under $40. Because let's be real. Men are SO much more difficult to shop for than women.

Happy Christmas!

Tommys Message from Santa

You've got to do this for your kids...or grown up. Its amazing to see his eyes light up and talk back to Santa. Pretty fun. Free and worth the 5 min to create. Check out Tommys:

http://www.portablenorthpole.tv/watch/m1uMxMWstytEDYit5TXcCeg

Party of FOUR!!!

Ive been waiting and waiting to write and announce...but wanted to wait till we knew everything was ok. YES! We are having baby number 2!!
We are thrilled and feel blessed. Tommy is so excited to be a big brother and apparently in preschool walks around with a baby on his shoulder saying it his "new baby". He said from day one that we told him that's its a baby brother...and he's right...so far. We have been going through a lot of genetic testing, and in all the ultrasounds weekly, they are pretty sure we are having another BOY!

Testing is very scary, especially when you get results that are not what you want. The same thing happened with Tommy...false positives for terrible things...but now the new baby is showing some not so good sighs either. Further testing will help us feel at ease in the next few weeks. Keep us in your prayers.

I was hoping the second time around...no such luck!! Ive been just as sick. HORRIBLE. Like cant get out of bed most days. My Mom came in to take over, and it couldn't have been a bigger blessing since Rob is busy with surgery rotation. What would we do without help? Its hard for me to ask for cause I feel like I cant return the favor...But we all need it.

My Parents still Rock it

So, this post is mostly for family, for any Willardson will have little memory of an event where the uncles or my parents are singing.

My parents met in a folk band. Story goes, my Dad was passing by an apartment where he heard a girl singing in through the vents...It was my mom. He had a band, but really wanted a female lead. My Dad is rather shy, so the next part is shocking. He knocked on the door and said he loved her voice, and wanted her to come to their band practice to check them out. My mom said she could go only "right then", so she went in her curlers to the practice. The rest is history. They were their own band at their wedding, barefoot and all.

Growing up, at least a few times a week, my dad would play his guitar to us individually in bed for lullabies. I know, I'm a lucky kid. My childhood was mainly the Beatles, James Taylor, Bob Dylan, and other classics.

My parents have always been in some sort of band. My Dad just started a new classical guitar one with some guys he knows. Not many Hippies turned CFO's keep rockin like he does. Ive always wanted to have my parents hit a professional recording studio and record all our childhood songs. This has yet to happen. However, my Little Brother recorded my parents at a cousins wedding this weekend singing very randomly, and a few other childhood songs with my Dad just practicing. Notice he is sitting outside the closet on the stairs. This is mainly my Dad in these videos...I hope to record many more, but this is what Tommy and I have been watching all day. Miss you Mom and Dad!









My dad played this at their best friends funeral, Lisa. She was from Idaho and loved this song.

Politics

SO We aren't huge into politics, but this made us cry and pee ourselves.

Love My kid

I don't know if Moms every these experiences like I do... Some days you struggle just to get through without wanting to REALLY yell at your kid. Or hearing your name, oh, every 15 seconds. Then, there are the moments that hit you like a wave...LOVE. WOW. How could I love someone so much? How can his giggle, smile, and personality just be better than anything to you some days?? How can it be that after I put him to bed, and I'm saying my prayers asking me to help me better a better, more patient mom...I'm filled with love and sneak in his room, get into his toddler bed WITH him, and hold him. Only cause if I didn't, I swear I would burst. Funny, cause most nights, its a countdown till he gets in bed, and others, I just want to hold him. Why?? This is why...


The movies of our past week...Tommy going under anesthetic for getting his teeth done. Yes,I filmed it like any good mother would.
Tommy being a Lion. Need I say more?
Tommy being his Dad and his friends only form of entertainment some days.

Catching up with us...The past two weeks

This year, Robs sister Suzie moved back to town from Missouri with her 6 girls. Tommy is loving his cousins and Auntie Suzie! They invited us on their family outing to the Midway Swiss days and the Sheep Dog tournament. I thought it would be weird, but it was a total blast!!

Tommy milking a fake cow with Abbey

Tommy finally has got his "imaginative Play" going in his little brain. he is loving to dress up all the time, This is a new Pirate costume we bought for him to play "Jake and the Never land Pirates".

My little man started preschool!! Its hard to believe...I know people say that, but really, it is. It is just down the street from us, and he is in the morning session. We chopped off his mo-hawk the night before so that the teachers wouldn't judge him, or label him as a "bad Ass". Little did we know his new teacher will, would have tatoos everywhere, earings, and green painted finger nails. He probably would have been teachers pet had we kept it.

The little play yard at the school.

Tommy showing off his puzzle skills, and me trying not to cringe at how dirty the puzzle is.

Meeting will and his teachers for the first time.

My most treasured video by far...him running to his first day of school. I think no one runs well in backpacks, but somehow, he looks adorable.

On 9/11, we reflected as a family the many sacrifices we have been through due to this day in history. Two deployments, Rob seeing men wounded and killed, and the sacrifice that is still being made today. As little as people understand that kids sense things, they do somehow.I caught Tommy and his friend Charlotte our by the flag that I thought was a perfect idea of what a child might think of this day...something to respect and think on.

The life of a mom

So, I remember when I was in college and thinking, "My life is so crazy. How can it get any more busy"? Then, I was married, working and going to school, and the thoughts reoccurred. Then, Rob went to Iraq and I was working and alone...same thoughts. Now, those thoughts of"Seriously, I'm so dead tired" happen daily. I didn't think having just one kid was too much work...I mean people around me have like 3-8 kids, and seem to manage just great. But I was wrong. Most days I feel like I'm a clown of sorts, constantly trying to entertain and stimulate Tommy. Then, laundry, dishes, meals, and all in 800 square feet of cinder block. Trying to get through each day making sure I haven't screwed my child up to the point of therapy.
Then I remember how much I longed for this, to be a mom. How long I prayed, the health struggles I deal with to bring a baby here, and it humbles me to the core. Sure, there are days where I hope no one can see just how pathetic I am, and try to appears that I have it all together. When in reality, WHO DOES? May all us moms just take a deep breathe and realize we all have TONS going on, be it 1-8 kids, and we are all doing our best! Pat on the back to us.
A friend recently posted this article on her blog...I loved it. Thanks Jana. Us Moms need some validation some days.
click on it to enlarge.

Month Update: St. Matrin, 24th of July, Rob Turns 30!

About 5 hours after Robs Medical Board exams, we headed off to the Caribbean to an Island called St. Martin. It was wonderful! We actually got to be with each other for more than a few hours, and find out that we still really did love eachother. Ha ha.



Robbie and I were in charge of the Stoker reunion this year in beaver over the 24th of July. In Beaver this is a huge deal, Rob said it was better than Christmas for him. To top it all off, Robs parents were made the Grand Marshalls this year! We all congregated together to celebrate and we in the parade.



We had a family Luau that night and played family groups games. it was so much fun!
Rob turned 30 this year on July 30. I wanted to make it a fun and special day, so I planned a huge surprise. I arranged for him to go skydiving...something on his bucket list, not mine. He was floored and a little scared, having to "walk the walk after he talked the talk". Our nephew Ryan went with him.
Rob also decided to cut T's hair into a Mohawk. A Drastic one. He looks like a mixture of native American and a punk rocker.

The board Exam...and BIG trip...leaving Tommy

SO, lots will be happening this week. Rob takes his board exam for medical school (AKA Step One of the Boards) on Sunday. He has been doing 12-14 hour study days the past 2 weeks on top of studying the past year. It will determine where we get into for Residency. No pressure, right?

With all of this, and realizing we wont see him at all next year, we decided (with the advice for many older medical students) to do a trip just us. It will most likely be the last vacation we will have for quite some time alone. We leave just hours after the test. So, we are leaving Tommy in Beaver with Robbie's family...the first time Ive left him somewhere overnight really...HUGE GULP...I think I'll be more homesick for him than anything...

Then head off to the Caribbean to the island of St. Martin...


Don't be jealous please. We deserve this!

Memorial day...are you "earning it"?

While most just think of Memorial Day as just another day off of work and school, we are trying to actually let it sink in. I won’t lie, I often thought of Memorial Day as a great camping trip and BBQ. Having Robbie be a Veteran now twice over, I think that we have a bigger responsibility to actually honor those who came before and served. We started going to the Military cemetery a few years a go and putting flags and flowers on soldiers’ graves. It’s a small cemetery, and some soldiers’ graves are from the 1860’s. Looking at all of them it is hard not to feel humbled at what you are actually looking at. Lives that were sacrificed for MY freedom. Rob is now among the elite and smaller group of individuals these days who can call themselves Veterans. There is a bond that he talks about among the Brotherhood of Military men, one that most can’t understand. Rob asked if we could watch “Saving Private Ryan” to reflect on those who sacrificed. I was, as the first time I saw it, moved to tears from the first scene as the young men called out in pain and for their mothers. My own thoughts turned to my son and whether he would ever know war, and how I pray he will never have to be afraid like that. I wondered how these men had the courage to do what they did, and keep going when you felt like the world was caving in. Rob explained the immense amount of training that you go through in Basic training and how they prepare you for everything. But can anyone ever be prepared for war?

At the end of the movie, I noticed Rob crying (he will love that I'm writing this). There is a scene where the man who saved the private that he needs to “Earn it”. Earn the freedom and chance he got to live, while others didn’t. Rob said through deep introspection, “Am I earning it? So many people have died in war…why not me? Why was I protected? Why am I the lucky one”? The thought has often occurred to me how lucky we were to have Rob come back from war untouched. But he was more worried if he, too, had “Earned it”. While it is closer to home for one who has served or their loved one, shouldn’t we all think for just a second, have we “earned it”? Earned our right to be here with loved one, choosing professions, raising families with freedoms of religion and speech? Why are we so lucky? The answer is because of others sacrifice. What am I doing with that? Well, first off, I’m going to celebrate every holiday honoring our country and its service men. Still that isn’t enough really, is it? We should live to our potential that these freedoms offer, and feel grateful we have a choice. Whatever political stance you take, it shouldn’t matter whether or not you honor those who gave their all for you. Are you “earning it”?

On a side note of amazing things that we enjoy, Robbie finished his second year of medical school! Half way there!! We have the board examination at the end of June, and that’s the big kahuna. From there he just works like a dog at the hospital…but no more classes at least! He couldn’t have done it without the incredible help of his friends in school with him.

welcome Year 3!!

Unwinding after finals!

Update: Some funny Videos...

Tommy loves where we live cause he always have a friend nearby. Tallie has been his friend since birth practically...he loves playing with her, even if it means he wears a dress. Rob was appalled at this picture.

Every Wednesday we go to a Mom and Me time at "bouncin off the walls" with our neighbors Peyton and Jeni. We love it!

Here is a funny video where Tommy took his first poop...he was rewarded with a New Thomas the Train set...PERCY. Not to be confused at what he calls it.


One big snowman with Dad. Rob Goes big or goes home.

Updates: Rob and Kates getaway

A few weeks back, things were getting pretty stressful. My Mom came into town to relieve us from Tommy for a night or two. We skipped town and went to Vegas baby!!

Serendipity Cafe...Frozen hot chocolate! Yummy!
We went to Cirque Mystere...pretty weird but cool from the 2 row!!Who needs Italy when you have Vegas?

Updates: Tommy turned 3!

Funny how I avoid blogging cause I feel that I'm so far behind...only leaving me to keep piling up pictures and events to blog! So here it is...maybe a few posts to show you what we have been up to

THOMAS TURNS 3!! Tommy is obsessed with Toy Story...and Buzz light year in particular. It been nearly impossible to pry him out of this costume. We did a Toy Story party, and invited anyone who wanted to dress up with him to join.

Our favorite Mexican place made Tommy his own cake. Nasty, but sweet of them!

A new Hair cut for Tommy at Cookie cutters. They do it in kids cars so they sit still. Genius.

Tommys party...there were 3 Buzz lightyears.
My attempt at an alien cake...
Freeze ance with a bubble machine. My attempt to have a rave with Tommys nursery class.

One of the games we played. "Pin Woody or Buzz on the Bed". Rob later informed me that this was a dirty game for kids.

So with Spring upon me, I’m finding it hard to find the “Spring” in my step when it’s snowing and raining outside. Rain, rain, go away…right? Well, I decided to think about how it’s not so bad after all…I noticed the tulips outside my house. They're trying so hard to push through the soil, only to be trodden by the snow for days. Well, isn’t that like life? But I know they will keep on. It made me smile. Then I got in my car and decided to turn the radio up to the top volume and sing Taylor Swift songs (Go ahead and make fun of me; I'm a teeny bopper) at the top of my lungs. Thomas was laughing so hard insisting I do it again. Of course I gave my star cheerleading performance for him, smiles and all. I realized how happy it made me. So many little things can lift the soul. Here are some other things I’m grateful for and make me happy today, despite the lack of signs of spring…

• · Good toilet paper. I hate the stuff at stores. You need like 35 squares. I like having my stuff at home. And one day, I can afford to buy the fancy stuff that feels like pillows on my butt!

• · Velcro on Tommy's shoes. His converse has Velcro. They don’t look like handicap kids shoes or anything, but they make life easier.

• · Good pillows and bedding. I LOVE my bed.

• · Shoes. I have crappy bunions, and have resided to the fact that I no longer can walk around in cute high heels chasing a 3 year old. I have fallen in love with the UGLIEST shoes on the planet…shoes you only see hippies and old people who need orthotics wear…Dansko clogs. I swore I would never be seen in public in ugly shoes, yet its all I wear now. I got these for Christmas. It’s all I got cause they cost an arm and a leg.

• · Perfume. I love smelling good. I love smelly things.

• · Diet coke of course…which I will be cutting back on…three 44 oz. a day just isn’t right.

• · Free utilities (included in rent) at my apartment. Crank up the heat!

• · Baths. I take a bath almost every night with salts and relax. Some say that’s weird. I say necessary.

• · FRIENDS.

• · A husband who is AMAZING…hot, sweet, SMART, thoughtful, funny. And the best father a kid could ever ask for.
  

• · A dishwasher, I hate doing dishes by hand.
  
• Diapers..disposable. I couldn't do cloth...washing and drying. Or like the old days, washing and hanging them to dry. We are blessed!
  

• · Scotch tape…ever thought what we would do without tape?

• · Movies…Anything that takes me away. Namely, Anne of Green Gables, Pride and Prejudice, and chick flicks.

• · Automatic locks on my car.

• · My Vacuum. I have to vacuum everyday, and if I had a crappy one (I did) you notice. I love my new one. I appreciate how good it is now!

• · Music- it can lift my mood and calm me, and make a party!

• · Medicine- Keeps me working.

• · Thomas- my biggest blessing and challenge some days. My constant companion for the next 15 years, the little voice who is always calling me, and the one who always brings me to realize how lucky I am his mom.

• · Cell phone- what did we ever do without them? What did our parents do??

• · Pajamas- I have a collection of them.
• Frozen yogurt- Yum!
• Fresh Flowers
  

So many things can make me happy in one day or hour. I just gotta sit back and think about it and REALIZE it.