My cousin came up with this list for what husbands should and should not do for gifts, and I thought it was great. Take a look: I think almost anyone could benefit from a few basic tips/rules/suggestions for more effective holiday shopping.
So here we go:
1) Don't buy her jewelery. Unless you have really good taste.
2) You probably don't have really good taste.
3) things that are out unless specified on her list: electronics, exercise equipment, cleaning supplies, things for her car.
4) Ask her friends. Ask her friends what their favorite books are, and get her one that she doesn't have yet. Same goes for music and movies.
5) Instead of buying her clothes, give her a gift card to her favorite clothing store. It isn't tacky or impersonal. It's a gift with three purposes. !) she gets new clothes. 2) You're giving her the gift of shopping. Most women will tell you that at least half the joy of clothing comes from shopping for it. That's why they call it "retail therapy". 3) Now she already has a way to go blow off some steam the next time you upset her. ;)
6) If you go unique, stick with her style. Don't give a vintage treasure to a contemporary minimalist. Do give the antique butter churner to the farmhouse knick knack collector.
7) Give the gift of time. Time away to relax at a massage, pedicure, or haircut. Time together at a concert, theater, or bed & breakfast (hey, that one probably benefits you too!) Time you spent on fixing/creating something for her.
8) Think ahead. Don't limit yourself to gifts that can only be enjoyed during the winter months. Get her and the kids season passes to the pool, zoo, or amusement park. Plant a bunch of bulbs in the yard when she is out one day, and give her the gift of anticipating a flowery spring.
9) Think: "What will make her life easier or more enjoyable?" when giving gifts of service.
10) Even if you "stick to the list", make sure there is at least one surprise for her. Even if it is a pack of her favorite gum tucked into her stocking, some hair product one of her friends recommends, or a kitchen gadget.
11) Try not to sabotage her goals. For example, if you know she has a resolution to lose 20 lbs in 2012, don't give her a gift card to TCBY, and don't stuff her stocking with a 6 month supply of harry and davids. Instead, if you know she wants to read more, get her a book, run more, load up her ipod with good running music or get her a jogger pepper spray, Gatorade, and some Gu, or a cute bag to put her workout gear in. Notice how careful I was to not include a workout video or gym membership in that list of suggestions. Whether she wants to create, travel, write, save, or learn, try to think of ways to build her up and help her do those things, rather than gifting something that will distract or prevent her from doing what she wants.
12) Nothing beats a handwritten note. And words of appreciation are free.
13) Now, make the holidays easy and go make a list of ideas for her to get for you. There must be at least 10 things on the list that are under $40. Because let's be real. Men are SO much more difficult to shop for than women.
Happy Christmas!
3 years ago
